by Steve Raymond, Director, One2One Home Care

A nasty truism of aging is that some of our most competent, successful, self-actualized and responsible citizens become very dangerous drivers. They become dangerous to themselves and dangerous to others. That is just a simple fact that is true in every single community in our car-driven country. The shocking stories are many... I won’t sensationalize them here.

Of course, it’s one thing to say “Aging drivers can be dangerous” as social commentary. It’s another thing altogether to say it to an aging individual who is going through the transition from complete autonomy to increasing dependence upon others. It is always a difficult conversation, but it is a crucial conversation to have at the right time. It is a conversation I have had more times than I can count, and went through it for a few years with my own father. He was a 30-plus years Teamster and long-haul truck driver. You think he gave up his keys very easily?

The problem is, there is no absolute, black-and-white “Right time.” You may have a perfectly competent 94-year old driver, and a menace-on-the-road 69-year old driver. Age is not at all a good indicator. There are many ambiguities and varying circumstances. However, truth be known, by the time most drivers give up their keys, everyone around them would agree that they should have given up their keys a long time sooner than they did.

The loss of driving skills and reflexes creeps up on people unless they have had a suddenly adverse health event that makes it impossible for them to drive. As it is creeping up on an aging individual, there can be such deep resistance to “giving up” that there can be very deep levels of denial and covering up the various mishaps that are the early warning signs of a dangerous driver. The car evolves more unexplained dings and dents and sideswipes and all the family members have raised eyebrows, but feel perplexed about what to do. 

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