Fri, 08/05/2022 - 6:30am


This isn't just another stupid blog about how to train your dog to play the oboe, nor is it anything useful like how to get your Mastiff to stop knocking over elderly house guests and your defense

And it's certainly not an overdone, gushy, celebration of everything dog and how awful Bipeds are. It also leaves out a lot of obvious and tedious "Dog Jokes" in the first person. Jokes like, "I'm going to check my peemail." GET IT?!?! IT"S LIKE EMAIL. BUT DOGS PEE EVERYWHERE AND SNIFF IT!!! PEEMAIL!!! GET IT??! GET IT!?!? GET IT?!?! HA HA HAH HABHAHBNIH HAHAHAHAHWHHJIBDIJHBDJ*&*^$&82021-0HAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

SO LET'S GET THIS STRAIGHT: Every month one of my dogs or myself writes a blog and it's not stupid. This month it's Teddy's turn.

He's a very good dog. And he only has half a jaw.

And one other thing. Teddy doesn't write a blog. We just steal entries from his diary. That's how badass we are. And this month he wonders why he has only half a jaw.

So get yourself a cup of hot chocolate or knock back a champagne flute full of exposed, tepid, 5yr-old Cutty Sark scotch and click on "Half-Jaw Spaghetti" -by Teddy (Half-Jaw) Spaghetti. He would click on your blog if you were missing half a jaw.


Read our latest World-Famous Newsletter that will educate you regarding which puppeteer lizard overlords give out ice cream and which just want to eat you: https://mailchi.mp/twosaltydogs/the-salty-paws-august-2022-7225928

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