CRIKEY!!!!!

I am taking lessons from "Putin's Playbook." Two Salty Dogs will ruthlessly invade Waldoboro unless everyone on my newsletter list hands over all their monthly disposable income, any pocket change, John McClane and any Nakatomi Corporation bearer bonds.

I'm serious this time.

Anyway, buy some stuff here this month so it's worth my while to continue to create original, if not misleading content. I swear if you guys don't buy a bunch of stuff this month I'm just going to copy and paste stuff from old 80's weightlifter magazines.

ALL HARNESSES ON SALE

I like clams I like Clams
They're mushy
They make me feel like a man
They make me feel like a man

I like clams
They're mushy
They have shells
That I crack
I find the love within
I dip them in the butter
And I squish them with my teeth.

I get pleasure from the body
That I put into my mouth

I like clams
They're mushy
They make me feel like a man
They make me feel like a man

Steamers or Cherrystone
Little Neck or Fried
All guaranteed with joy inside

I like clams
They're mushy
They make me feel like a man
They make me feel like a man

I like a clambake with my baby
4 dozen in the pot
I eat clams at every meal
It's humane
Because they don't squeal
Steamers or Cherrystone?
Calling all clams around the world
Come close
I wanna be your pal

I like clams
They're mushy
They make me feel like a man
They make me feel like a man

I like clams
They're mushy
They make me feel like a man
They make me feel like a man

Steamers or Cherrystone
Little Neck or Fried
All guaranteed with joy inside

Oh my!

I Like Clams - From the album "Spawn" by Harm Farm - Click on the link for proof I didn't make that up.

Oh yes. And we're offering a sale on dog harnesses. Even the brand new ones from Belted Cow if I get them all put into the website before the painkiller prescription expires.

ALL HARNESSES
NOW 25.74% OFF!
Use Coupon Code: ILIKECLAMS
<< Click HERE >>

Read our latest Newsletter that is just chock full of this commercial garbage here:  https://mailchi.mp/twosaltydogs/the-salty-paws-may-2022-7225892

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