Finding Our Voices

Sat, 03/23/2024 - 10:15am

Mary Lou Smith spreading light at the sold out “Evening With Gabriel Bryne” fundraiser for the grassroots nonprofit, Finding Our Voices, at the Camden Opera House on March 9. Mary Kamradt photo

Mary Lou Smith and Patrisha McLean in 2019 in Castine. Courtesy of Finding Our Voices

Mary Lou Smith spreading light at the sold out “Evening With Gabriel Bryne” fundraiser for the grassroots nonprofit, Finding Our Voices, at the Camden Opera House on March 9. Mary Kamradt photo

Mary Lou Smith and Patrisha McLean in 2019 in Castine. Courtesy of Finding Our Voices

Mary Lou Smith, 84-year-old survivor of domestic abuse, has been named a Top Business Leader of the Year by MaineBiz for her volunteer work with Finding Our Voices.

Smith, a retired first grade teacher living in Scarborough, is one of 12 people being honored in 2024 for “their contributions to the economy, our state, and our daily lives,” according to the website of Mainebiz, a “leading source of Maine business news and analysis.”

A Finding Our Voices contingent wearing the nonprofit’s trademark color yellow will be joining Smith at the MaineBiz award ceremony in Portland on April 10. “It is time for all businesses in Maine to start talking about how domestic abuse is impacting staff as well as management,” said Patrisha McLean, CEO and founder of the statewide, survivor-powered group, “and I am so happy that Mainebiz and also Mary Lou are leading the way."

Mary Lou Smith is a retired first grade teacher who left her 43-year abusive marriage to a college professor in 2005. In 2019, she read about McLean’s traveling exhibit of photo portraits of Maine survivors and drove to the opening reception in Castine. “The rest,” Smith said, “is history. Since that day I have been committed and dedicated to sharing my story with Finding Our Voices to help others leave their own hell on earth.”

Mary Lou Smith met Patrisha McLean for the first time Memorial Day 2019 at the opening reception in Castine for the Finding Our Voices exhibit of Patrisha’s portraits of survivors of domestic abuse. That traveling exhibit, launched at the Camden Public Library, was the spark for Finding Our Voices.

Smith is one of 45 Maine domestic abuse survivors whose photo portraits and names are on the Finding Our Voices posters papering downtown business windows in more than 90 Maine towns as well as on bookmarks that are scaled-down versions of the posters. Her quote in this campaign is “It’s never too late to leave.” According to McLean, ways ways that Smith has spread this message over the years with Finding Our Voices include survivor-led panel discussions from Eastport to York and including Damariscotta, distributing the posters and bookmarks across Mane and having meaningful conversations along the way, and "even getting her dentist on board our Finding Our Smiles statewide program of free dental care.”

Smith told Mainebiz magazine that the Finding Our Voices panel discussions that are continuing into 2024, “have given me the opportunity to share my story in person to give hope to those still living in abusive relationships. A woman told me that talking with me after one of these events prompted her to leave her abusive situation. I had tears in my eyes and joy in my soul.”

According to McLean, Smith helps her to facilitate the Finding Our Voices weekly online support group, as well as its online book club that looks at life through the lens of domestic abuse. Smith was a co-leader with McLean of many book discussions for incarcerated women at the prison in Windham.

Locally, Smith opened the Finding Our Voices presentation at the Camden Public Library last November of men talking about growing up with abusive fathers by sharing her experience as a mother feeling helpless to protect her children. Earlier this month, she greeted attendees of the group’s sold-out “Evening with Gabriel Byrne” event at the Camden Opera House. “Mary Lou told me,” McLean said, "that at breakfast the next morning at the Lord Camden Inn she gave the servers her Finding Our Voices bookmarks and told them all about us, and they all hugged.”

Finding Our Voices is the grassroots, survivor-powered nonprofit breaking the silence of domestic abuse across Maine one community and conversation at a time including with financial assistance to empower women to Get Out and Stay Out, and get their children safe as well. For more information visit https://findingourvoices.net.

first meeting Memorial Day 2019, at an opening reception in Castine for the Finding Our Voices exhibit of Patrisha’s portraits of survivors of domestic abuse. The traveling exhibit launched at the Camden Public Library, was the spark for Finding Our Voices.